Conventional Weapons

Remember that weaker weapons can be found in the Robotics section.

2000 creds - Mounted Laser

Comparing this to the forceps laser is like comparing moldy apples to decayed, gnat-ridden oranges. While the forceps laser is particularly good at roasting squishies through the window of their cockpit, the mounted laser is tough enough to cut cheese. Sometimes. Warning: Lasers are invisible. Please don't ask your allies to fly in front of the weapon to be sure it's working.

2000 creds - Particle Gun

REKT is proud to present our very own version of Death By A Thousand Cuts. Originally designated for use as a children's toy, it proved to be slightly too fatal for standard commercial use. Pulling the trigger releases a withering spray of sand-like metal particles propelled to ultrahigh speeds, so you can sandblast your enemies to dust. Sandblasting time may vary. Contrary to popular opinion, saying "pew pew" while firing is not necessary, though we can install a soundcard to achieve the same effect if it's really that important to you.

2000 creds - Electrolaser

The standard Forceps Laser built onto a radial mount with an added electron gun. While the laser itself is just as pathetic, this model includes an electron gun, permitting you to zap your targets distracted by the glaring red beam in their eyes. Can cycle between states if you wish, but please remember that the electricity is only visible in ionizing gases. Perfect for crowd control and magic shows. Using it underwater may be slightly less than intelligent.

3000 creds - CESTUS Pod

You don't look hardcore. I can imagine you throwing bricks through a store window and then running home to mommy, which is why the CESTUS Pod is right up your alley. Completely lacking in any sort of style or form, it's a quad-pack of explosive, rocket-propelled bricks perfect for smashing windows - or armor, if you're moving up in the world. It packs a punch, hits hard, and leaves a mark your foe won't soon forget. It'll take some skill to use, but if you want to deal some damage and get out fast, this is how you do it.

3000 creds - Railgun

Fukcing magnets, man. How do they hurl slugs at hypersonic speeds? To the scientist, this incredibly complex, miniaturized weapon is the result of years of brilliant research, with more working parts than you could shake a stick at. To you, it's a shiny tube of death that's a hell of a lot of fun to use. Unfortunately, the limited ammo supply means you'll have to save it for use against bad people with shiny death tubes of their own.

5000 creds - Rocket Shotgun

Rockets? Shotgun? Hell yes! This is that which haunts your wildest dreams. Mount just one of these on the side of your CASKET, press the trigger, and watch from the relative safety of your cockpit as your target (and everything nearby) gets pulpified to a fine goo. Packs a heavier punch than the Rocket SML, with the drawback that it doesn't have quite the same accuracy or rate of fire. Use at night under a full moon for best effects.

5000 creds - GAMBIT Dual Laser

Imagine the situation you were in last mission. You've flown boldly into the alien's inner sanctum, and were instantly surrounded by hostiles. You can only get one shot off before they're upon you, but you can't decide between shooting them or your squadmate, who's just spouted off yet another pun. With this weapon, you don't need to. The GAMBIT Dual Laser is capable of automatically targeting up to two enemies at a time within approximately 45 degrees of each other, or firing both at the same target. Get an alien and get your pesky squadmate too.

6000 creds - PION Beam Cannon

Remember those beam weapons on those shows you loved so much when you were a kid? They all had one thing in common: epic sound effects. That's all this thing has going for it. All the other weapons in this price tier deal more damage. And this thing? Not much. It'll do more than the electrolaser, sure, and it actually has a generator so you'll never run out of ammo, but it's not going to do any miracles. Don't blame me for the ridiculous acronym, either - it was the physicists' ideas, and everybody knows physicists can't write for shit. Neither can engineers. Anyway, what it stands for hardly matters. It's a piece of in-operable nothing, but if you can't part with your inner obese nerd, the perfect idiocy option is now all yours, so put it on the noisiest settings and enjoy.

6000 creds - Rocket SML

Why use bullets when you can unleash a hailstorm of tiny explosive warheads instead? This sub-machine launcher will unleash a large quantity of rocket-propelled death pills at a rate of five per second and can reduce a slab of concrete into gravel in roughly half that. Unfortunately, they take a little while to detonate and will quickly lose accuracy with distance, rendering the ammo ineffective at anything but medium range… but you could probably still ram it into someone.

7000 creds - Explosive Gauss Cannon

A specialized railgun that fires detonating rounds with a decent blast radius. If you can imagine something awesome, like a minigun, and then something else awesome, like a dinosaur, this is like putting the two together. With a high rate of fire, excellent accuracy, and a well-documented record of making battle-hardened soldiers squeal like little girls, we're confident you'll find a use for it, even in mundane situations like walking the dog.

8000 creds - Quantum Cannon

Thanks to Platoon 56's recovery of a Quantum anti-ship drone, we've been able to throw together a prototypical version of the thing. It's big and shiny, so we're sure you'll find it attractive, especially as it's got a imperial fuckton of firepower behind it. Sick of that annoying squadmate? Blast holes through him. Come up against an enemy you can't dodge? Blast holes through him. Tired of waiting for your hacker to open a door? Blast holes through him. As you can clearly see, when it comes to blasting holes through things, nothing beats Quantum tech. Can fire multishots or single shots; can take some time to recharge.

8000 creds - KAMEHA Blaster

Unlike most lasers, the KAMEHA doesn't end its act by throwing a little light at your foes. It throws a ton of high-powered particles at excessively high speed, completely emptying its non-rechargable battery with every shot. This gives you enough power to absolutely shatter a CASKET or similar vehicle with even a glancing hit, as the explosion goes into the atomic level. Of course, you have to buy extra batteries if you want to continue the epic carnage - and after all, who wouldn't? The KAMEHA Blaster isn't just a laser. It's a way of life. Best for when you absolutely need to blow someone back to the stone age.

9000 creds - Neutron Beam Projector

The exact technobabble behind how this baby works is going to go way over your heads, so I'll explain it like this: This weapon fires a large, invisible beam of "OH SHIT RUN" that methodically melts your targets to sizzling pools of goo. Can double as a barbeque at low power, so long as you like your meat well-done. While slightly less powerful than a proton sword in destructive capability, the massive width of its beam tends to make up for that.

10000 creds - Heavy Gauss Cannon

How does one make the gauss rifle more powerful? Triple the size and load it with layered explosive shells tipped with an anomalous alloy to punch very large holes in very angry things. This hulking brute of a cannon ought to be affixed to a destroyer or something, but if your ship can take it, we'll put it on directly with a standard radial mount. As a weapon it is unquestionably effective, but also very ungainly to use because of the weight and recoil. Also, just in case this wasn't clear, don't fire it at close range unless you like plasma-assisted suntans.

11000 creds - Gatling Plasma Cannon

These four rotating barrels of death apply a stream of high-powered, bright green plasma bolts to whatever target you decide to lazily aim yourself at, and will quickly proceed to rip it to pieces - no questions asked. Why does it rotate? I'm glad you asked. I have no clue, and I asked too. Wanna know the answer I got? "Because it's 60% cooler that way." And you want to know the best part? Our engineers are at least twice as intelligent as you are. They made this thing. It cuts through armor like butter. They're smarter than you. Buy it. It'll make you look more intelligent - and, of course, 60% cooler with every shot.

11000 creds - SILICON Variable Laser

Need something done in a hurry? The SILICON is where it's at. Originally intended for construction, it was later decided to be pointlessly obtuse. It's not our fault the engineers on the inner worlds couldn't grasp the concept of a variable gamma ray or microwave laser, or the multitude of uses it might have. We got them shipped back here - and now you guys get to experiment with them until we find a good niche to sell them to. And for the record, it has nothing to do with silicon. Our engineers just like acronyms.

15000 creds - Heavy Quantum Launcher

Bigger is better, am I right? For the fella that couldn't be big in some places, we now present to you our prototypical Heavy Quantum Launcher. This bad boy is capable of launching absolutely massive heatseeking balls of plasma that travel at a slow 300 kilometers per hour. These monsters will absolutely consume anything with less armor than a battleship, and when they reach the end of their lifespan, explode like nothing you've ever seen. As you'd expect, it also takes more batteries than anything you've ever seen. Thrown together in a hurry, it may be accident prone and we are certainly not responsible for any mishaps you may have while using it.

18000 creds - GSC

The GSC, or Guided Sniper-Cannon, is affectionately termed "Sniper's Delight", and not without good reason. Clocking in at half the length of a standard CASKET and requiring many times the strength, if you want something dead? The GSC can do it for you. See that little fast-moving dot on the horizon? Type in the correct data in your computer, pull the trigger, and a radar-guided slug within a superheated casing will guide itself to within an inch of your target utilizing projected gravitational fields. In short: this thing isn't your standard blaster. This is for when you want a capcracker with style. Refills are expensive, but well worth the effort, as it's almost impossible to miss at range. Don't try to use it up-close, though, as things could get messy.

20000 creds - Warp Cannon

The Warp Cannon is a very unique kind of weapon. Launched from a railgun and propelled to ridiculous speeds using rocket boosters, the Warp Cannon creates intense gravitational fields around itself when it detects nearby electrical signatures - intense enough to shred everything around it into dust, and then shred the dust into atoms, and then even the particles themselves. What you have here is basically a fusion instigator that creates your very own short-lived miniature black hole and star. Want to fuck something up? Fuck it up the first time. With the Warp Cannon, you cannot fail.